Immortal Shape-Shifting Dinosaur Vampires ~ 2/14/2015

I dreamed that two powerful vampires were gathering a huge gang of their kind to try to take over a science museum/zoo/hotel complex. It turns out the two of them were dinosaurs once, but they were immortal and shape-shifted down through the long years of evolution to avoid extinction and detection, and now they were vampires, but they wanted to be dinosaurs again, because, who wouldn't? To do this, they needed access to the dinosaur bones in the paleontology wing of the museum.

I was a vampire slayer, but I wasn't a very good one. Spike and I went to the hotel and I staked one vamp myself, while he took care of all the rest. We went back to the house where I lived with a bunch of other slayers. I decided I really needed to take a long hot bath, but people kept coming in and out while I soaked in the tub. A friend of mine came to me for advice. She sat on the other side of the bathroom while I leaned on the side of the tub, staying modestly hidden as she talked.

She told me about how her ex-husband and she had planned to take out a home improvement loan to fix up the house they needed to sell. But he had gone into the bank without her, taken out way too big a loan, and put down the fund she had saved to pay for her elderly mother's retirement care as collateral. Now the fund was being sucked dry, and she didn't know how she'd be able to pay for the care her mother needed.

Then some of the other slayers came in to tell me that one of the girls had run off and killed herself. Then Spike came in to tell me that the two main vampires, whom we thought we had destroyed, were still alive and were at the museum. So I got out of my bathtub and we headed back to the museum.

Along the way we found the highway littered with bodies. Somehow the vampires had cast a spell that killed anyone with a physical or mental disability and made the cars around them disappear. We had to be so careful driving down the freeways that by the time we reached museum, the two vampires had gotten to the bones they needed, and had transformed themselves into a Tyrannosaurus Rex and a Brontosaurus.

We began arguing with the dinosaurs, reminding them how much the world had changed since their kind had lived. We pointed out to the Brontosaurus that plants were completely different now, and there were no woods or wetlands nearby for her to graze. What exactly did she think she was going to eat, being a dinosaur in our times? And what exactly did she think her carnivorous partner was going to want to eat first, when she was the only other natural prey he had around? We succeeded in turning them against each other, and were about to defeat them when I woke up.